The Traffic Warden From Heaven

I always thought traffic wardens are supposed to write tickets and not point out to you that you shouldn't park where you park but that there is space on the other side of the street.

Who knew how wrong I could be?

Last Sunday, after a pub lunch out of town, we went into Kensington to meet a friend in the afternoon. After navigating our way through a maze of one-way streets, we finally found our destination and a parking spot right across the street from it.

Whilst we were still packing our things and our baby, a traffic warden walked past, but from our side there was no cause for concern since I thought I had legitimately parked the car.

Whilst walking past us he said: "I don't suppose you have a resident's permit, but let's assume I haven't seen that. However, if you want peace of mind, why don't you just pull your car over to the other side where there is a single yellow line which means it is allowed to park there this time of the day?"

From previous experiences, traffic wardens are usually fairly un-approachable and not susceptible to common sense at all.

Whether it was the fact that we were in the middle of getting our baby out of the car (which usually gets young a "young family" bonus) or he was just having a good day, I don't know .

And it doesn't matter, it's the result that counts.

And the fact that he played a role in rounding off a very pleasant Sunday afternoon.

Effortlessly.

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

A recent re-connect with a friend, the lack of quality drinking locations in the City and general depression brought us to grab a pint at "The Bolt Hole" off Cannon Street which turned into a after-work horror trip.

While the price of £6.40 for two 275ml bottles of Beck's (that being probably the worst beer that Germany could come up with) is already quite shocking, a more frightening experience occurred when visiting the gents'.

Looking into the bathroom mirror, suddenly an image appeared on that mirror announcing the release of the movie "Mirrors". I was surprised and intrigued about how nifty the projection on the mirror worked but what was being shown was fairly standard "Mirrors - In Theatres October 08" fare and therefore unremarkable.

Continuing to go about my business I turned my head away, and the next time I looked back towards the mirror, I was shell-shocked.

A rather distressed woman was seemingly behind the mirror, pressing her hands against it and screaming, eager to break through.

The announcement had changed to "There is evil on the other side."

And on this side, I was left wondering how small bottles of bad beer can cause such a trip.

Feel Free to Comment on My Life

Where did this come from? Initially we liked Facebook because we could post pictures and connect with friends we had lost touch with (apart from the fact that it was probably ok to lose touch with them).

Then we all felt compelled to update our online status whereever we were and whatever we did (well, probably not to that extent, but it felt as if people were giving away a lot of information about their whereabouts and whatabouts).

And at some point, probably when Facebook updated themselves to a new version, they introduced that people could comment on your status.

So, when doing innocuous little updates such as

"[mdtb] is at the gym."

you suddenly find people leaving comments like

"What are you doing this for, Fatboy?"

That's when I realised you're not only putting up your life, you're actually putting it up for debate.

So you better have a good reason for it.

Random Thought #4: Look Up!

Dogs can't do it, but you can. And in a very "Dead Poet's Society" way, it does in fact open up a new perspective.

As I recently walked through St. Katherine's Dock, a location I pass through with quite some regularity, I found myself waiting in a queue at the ATM, killing time, leaning backwards and spotting some artefact on a wall I hadn't seen before since I had never looked up there.

It turned out (as indicated by a plaque) that the artefact, a block of clear perspex showing a picture of a crown (more on it here) was planned to be featured in the Stanley Kubrick movie 2001: A Space Odyssey but was then replaced by the very well-known monolith.

I was fairly surprised that such a thing had escaped my attention for all the times I had walked past but felt that it simply confirms common sense.

Most of the time we only pay attention to what is clear view, usually at eye level and below. This is why supermarkets put whatever they want to sell you right there and not at a height of 7 feet. You wouldn't simply notice things up there (and you wouldn't be able to reach them but that's secondary).

On occasions it is great fun to walk through London and force yourself to pay attention to everything higher than let's say 10 feet.

You will be surprised about the amount of Gargoyles and statues you will find, as much as you will be simply putting a new angle on buildings that you might have walked past hundreds of times.

It beats reading the METRO hands down.

And by the way, dogs can look up as well but I thought it would make for a good opener.

Hate the Movie, Love the Review

Sometimes movie reviews turn out to be more entertaining than the movie itself. Whilst their purpose is to let you know what's worth your time and what isn't, it is an added benefit if they happen to be worth your time themselves.

And so I came across Simon Mayo and Mark Kermode's weekly hour-long dissection of what is on at your local multiplex.

While this show has been for a while, I only got onto it earlier this year and now the weekly podcasts are a much welcome distraction when making the way to work.

Kermode (the critic) is a horror movie afficionado and seems to have developed a strong following for his rants about movies he dislikes, which includes any movie with "Pirates" or "Caribbean" in the title or movies directed by Guy Ritchie.

Both of them work extremely well together despite the fact that Mayo never goes and sees any movie that Kermode recommends and -- even worse -- seems to enjoy movies that Kermodes loathes (such as RocknRolla).

But admittedly, the movies seem to be just an excuse for the two to get together and go on endlessly about Jason Statham, Liam Neeson and how "The Exorcist" is the greatest movie of all times.

The Mamma Mia review that is available on YouTube has to be a firm personal favourite.

And it didn't make me see the movie as a consequence.

Keep Your Dignity with Google Mail!

You have to love this. GoogleMail (or gmail) now has a feature that is aimed at preventing you from "drinking and mailing".

This feature - called Mail Goggles - is remarkably simple. You set up a time window (default is Friday and Saturday night between 10pm and 4am) at which you are most likely tempted to send out e-mails you might regret later.

Before the e-mail is sent out, you have to answer five maths questions correctly.

You can even set the level of difficulty for those questions, in case you happen to have a PhD in maths and consider yourself brilliant even when intoxicated.

Where were those features when we needed them most - 15 years ago, and applicable to all means of communications like phones, SMS etc?

I guess all you need now is a friend that prevents you from showing up drunk at you ex-wife's doorstep to embarrass yourself.

Although I don't want Google for this purpose.

Learn to Love Thy Employer

Imagine you get on a carousel and suddenly you realise you are going to be stuck on the horse you picked for the rest of your (working) life. Welcome to the Finance Industry in 2008.

Sometimes there is a reason why the good old days are called the 'good old days'.

When I quit my first job in banking to move on (and a little bit up) after about two years, my father, who had been with his employer all his working life, started to seriously question my sanity. For somebody who had spent the biggest part of five decades with the same corporation, my swift move seemed foolish at best and high treason at worst.

Remarkably enough, the next job I gave up after a much shorter period, but by this time, resignation on his side had already kicked in and he chose to trust my judgement.

For a while, changing jobs regularly seemed a fairly low-risk strategy. You didn't really have to worry too much about whether long-term affiliation with your prospective employer was an issue for you. With a planning horizon of 18-24 months, being bound to an employer never looked like much of a burden. Loyalty in many cases lasted as long as - and rarely longer than - the contractually specified (and bonus-related) tie-in period.

The job market resembled a carousel where the workforce, sometimes in teams, moved from one shop to the next to apply their trade for ever increasing fees.

Needless to say, in the midst of an ever larger number of job losses being announced, this carousel has seriously, if not totally, lost its momentum, and a lot of staff have found themselves in situations where they are spending a much longer time with their current institution than they initially anticipated.

Whilst realistically, those who are secure in their jobs should consider themselves lucky, there might be a number of staffers who are not lamenting job losses (yet) but are rather disappointed about the lack of alternatives out there.

Maybe when getting on this carousel, those people should have selected the horse they were going to sit on with a little bit more diligence, just in case they were going to get stuck.

Because that is what they are likely to be now.

Originally published on HereIsTheCity Life on 01-June-2008, the original can be found here.

The Freedom to Be Opinionated

Recently, whilst following the American election coverage and reading up on what people think about certain vice-presidential candidates I found a comment by a (presumably) American stating:

"You're not an American so you don't have the right to vote. Hence your opinion on the candidates is irrelevant."

Which made me think: First of all, whoever made this comment doesn't like the opinion of the other person (although this is not such a profound insight admittedly). And he probably isn't that pleased about what most people abroad think of certain Alaskan hockey moms.

Rendering the opinion irrelevant I thought was a more dangerous thing. The point is taken that you don't have to be won over since you are not the target audience. But does that mean until you're 18, your opinion doesn't matter.

Does it start to matter overnight? Or only if you like his opinion?

I guess if you throw your hat in the ring to stand in for the most powerful executive job in the world, you have to deal with the fact that people opine about you. Not only your voters, but everyone.

And since you end up dealing with Non-Americans, you might find out that their opinions matter.

Occasionally.