No Jobs, No Coffee, No Insurance

How do you know things are really bad? When you can't even get a headhunter to buy you a coffee anymore!

Oh well, I do remember the good old days.

Our knowledge on funky derivatives was a sparse asset and when you wanted to be treated to a coffee, you could just call up a headhunter of your choice, tell them that you were interested in opportunities. They would meet you for a coffee, on their expenses of course.

As a sign how far the market has plummeted, I recently got a phone call from a recruitment agent about some opportunity, which was the first call of that sort in a long, long time.

We met up at a local Starbucks and while the recruiter was going on about the exciting opportunity (just like the old days) we were sitting at Starbucks for the biggest part of half an hour - WITHOUT BUYING ANY COFFEE!

Nobody mentioned it, nobody offered it, they didn't have any beverage, and neither did I.

Of course, I could have bought one for me, but that defeats the purpose, doesn't it?

Slightly bemused by the fact I went back to the office, where I found an e-mail from my financial adviser about how insurers do not underwrite unemployment insurance for anyone working in the Financial Services Industry anymore.

So nobody pays me when I lose my job, nobody pays me to take on a new job and nobody buys
me a coffee to tell me about any jobs.

Looks like I'll be downsizing from a Venti Caramel Frappucinos to a regular filter coffee.

7 Reasons to Hate January

With the New Year upon us, it is sometimes a little difficult to be excited about what's ahead of us. In particular since every new year starts with the month of January which seems amongst the grimmest of them all.

Here are some reasons why we hate January:

1. Overcrowded gyms. The gyms are overcrowded with people who have either just subscribed to a membership they are going to use for about one month or with those who have subscribed in one of the previous year's January. Again, they will be gone by February but nevertheless a nuisance for the next few weeks.
2. Feeling the Weight. The excess weight that is. After eggnog lattes and mince pies galore it is impossible not to feel slightly heavy.
3. The Cold. Currently, London does not get anywhere above 0 degrees. But is it a charming, picturesque Winter Wonderland? No. It's just effing cold.
4. The Time to Bonus. With bonuses (albeit small) either already in your account or at least announced, the clock has effectively been set to zero again. Last year's achievements might not have paid off last year. They definitely won't count for this.
5. Detox. And by that we don't mean the rather dreadful Sylvester Stallone movie (which was D-Tox anyway) but rather the fact that there is a peer pressure of giving up booze and washing those toxins out of you. If only to make room for more toxins come February.
6. The aftermath of New Year's Resolutions. Let's face it - nobody ever keeps them, but that doesn't mean that one cannot feel a bit guilty about not living up to all those promises of New Year's Eve. Even if all those promises were born out of too much champagne.
7. Getting Older. Ok, it's a personal thing due to being born in January. Still counts though.

There might be some other things working in favour of good old Janus. But we will deal with those separately.